so today we had our first meeting of our basic skills class. this is where they try to take all the data that we will learn in the next two and a half years, make sense of it all, and teach us how to use it all in our interactions with our patients. neat. sounds exciting and harmless enough. The professor told us that we would learn to counsel patients regarding any questions they may have about their medications. no problem. so we should, therefore, know how to use the apparatuses correctly to ensure proper drug therapy. cool. which means that we will learn all about asthma inhalers, patch administration, and of course, injections. got it. i'm not crazy about needles. but i am okay with learning how to shoot people. it can't be that bad, right. but then he told us (and he was very excited about this, like it was going to be one of the most invaluable, most exciting, simply the coolest things we would ever get to do...) he told us that we would get to take an insulin syringe, fill it with placebo liquid, and inject it into our own stomachs!!! WAIT, what am i doing!?!? i know i am entering a job in the health-care world, i am well aware that this will involve the use of needles, but this is pharmacy school, i didn't sign up for this, i can inject my peers, but you want me to SHOOT MYSELF IN THE STOMACH!!! wow. that is going to be a hard day. i don't know what it is, i don't mind blood, i'm excited to try a surgery rotation, perhaps i'll even do a critical care or ER rotation, but there's just something about needles. and i've always had it, as long as i can remember. i give blood. but i can't look, or even think about it really (that's a terribly big needle). i get shots, but i can't look. at registration i had to have a TB skin test (and i have to get a second round tomorrow actually). i told myself that i would watch, and i did. at least i did until the needle reached my skin, and i had to look away...



i know i will overcome my aversion. i have to. right. i'm just nervous. what's gonna happen when i stab myself in the stomach and then pass out. what if i fall out of my chair and permanently lodge the syringe inside my abdominal cavity. what then? i just know i'm gonna look pretty silly on that day, laying on the floor, with an insulin syringe lodged in my bare stomach, crying like a small child. but i will persevere...